Pee Yer Pants Excited

Today is MonsterJam and to say Little J is excited is an understatement! He is practically vibrating. The Boy of a Million Questions is in fine form and let me tell you, I'm happy to go to work for a few hours to get some peace and quiet. He won't let me wear his earmuffs... "Mommy," he says in his best serious voice while shaking his hand at me "These are for little boys so they don't get hurt. You need to get your own. Safety first Mommy".

Came thisclose to smothering Big J with his pillow last night. Not only did he steal all the covers, he proceded to snore, snort and flop around on the bed like a dying trout. He wonders why I wake up angry....Doh! It's no wonder I'm exhausted. Sleeping is an extreme sport in my house.

The not smoking thing is going well, the saving money thing...not so well. I seem to have replaced the smoking habit with a venti white chocolate mocha habit. Good god, I have been to Starbucks more in the last week then in the previous year!

Good news is I gained 2 pounds this week . Bad news is I think it's all in my butt. Why not the boobies?? Why oh Why??

Too many babies!

WTH?

The woman who gave birth to Octuptlets already has 6 FREAKIN KIDS???

I'm speechless.

People who like people

To everyone who take the time to comment..


THANK YOU
THANK YOU
THANK YOU

That is all, carry on.

Friday Woot Woot

This week Friday is just another night I have to cook dinner. I work this weekend. BLECH!
And to top it off I have to work with the 'Lazy Dude'. Holy crap I want to poke him in the eye with my pen when I have to work with him. Is he really that stupid or does he just fake it to avoid being accountable? I may need to put some vodka in my water bottle. Actually that is a FABULOUS idea! I can imagine it now...

2 hours into my shift

Customer: Why is your manager standing on the service counter belting out Showtunes over the PA system?

4 hours into my shift

Customer: Why is that disheveled girl standing at the door crying and trying to hug me? She keeps saying "I love you man! I really really do!"

6 hours into my shift

Customer: Did you know there is someone barfing in the bushes outside the store?

8 hours into my shift

Customer: I think there's a dead person in your public washroom.


Good times I tell you, Good times.

Knock Knock

OK I can't go to bed on such a downer.. so here is a knock knock joke courtesy of Little J

Knock Knock.
Whose there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Orange you glad I didn't say Banana?

And at this point he dissolves into a fit of giggles. Good thing he's cute or he'd never pull it off.

Midnight is the witching hour

AAHHHHH Why are the nights the hardest? I have to be AT work in 6 hours and haven't gone to bed yet. I want a smoke dammit! I'm ready to rip off this damn patch and chew on it! This quitting thing sucks ass. The first week was 'fun' and exciting and now the thrill is gone and it's just damn hard. I've tried quitting hundreds of times with acupuncture, medication, hypnosis, cold turkey, pregnant Why would THIS time be successful?

I have a picture on my fridge that I 'borrowed' from the security cameras at work . It's of an old woman who came in the store. She had an oxygen tank and line up her nose, couldn't walk very well, couldn't talk due to a trache in her throat. She had to use a cart to lug her tank and herself around the store. While shopping she had a massive coughing fit and I was seriously worried that she would drop dead. The kicker?....

She reeked of smoke and the first thing she did when she left the store was light up a smoke!!!


I printed her picture so that I see this woman everytime I want to smoke. I do not want to 'grow up' and be like her. No way in hell would I put my kid through that.

Wow, that was a morbid post wasn't it? I need to go back to blowing sunshine out my ass. Or at least go to sleep so I am somewhat smart for work. :)

Butt kicking

I am getting by arse kicked by Little J playing Wii. And I really am trying!!!

*hangs head in shame*